Working in a big company is just like living in a small town--hard to keep a secret.
I had not told my coworkers about my adoption plans yet--I wanted to wait until I knew about when I would be going. I supervise about 100 people and work with at least twice that many on a daily basis and I just thought I didn't want all those people asking me everyday if I had heard anything yet and always having to say No.
Of course I had told a few that were closest to me and the people that needed to know--my boss and those who would have to do my job when I was gone. I hadn't heard anything at all at work until yesterday--one person came right out and asked me and then I started hearing that others knew too. So...I didn't really want to do it in an email but to stop the workplace rumor mill I did send an email to my whole staff to let them know what my plans were and that I was sorry it hit the rumor mill before I gave them the information. I did ask people to respect my privacy and not let my plans be the topic of break discussions--we will see what happens.
I think they will be happy for me but maybe part of me is worried about getting some negative responses also. So far, everyone that knows (the most important people in my life) has been very happy and supportive so I don't know why I am worried.
This is just another milestone in the adoption journey.
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Hi family and friends and fellow bloggers. I invite you all to read along as I take this journey to Motherhood. I attempted a Kazakhstan adoption that was not meant to be and then started over with a Russian adoption. I have now met my amazing daughter and am very happy. I am accepting any prayers you can send my way as I begin my new life as a mother. Please feel free to leave me any comments or questions by clicking on the comments link at the end of each post.
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My Timeline
11-27-2006--Made decision
Dec. 2006--Jan. 2007 researched agencies
2-1-2007--Applied to CHI's Kazakhstan program
2-13-2007--accepted into CHI Kazakhstan program
2-26-2007 to 5-1-2007 homestudy
5-28-2007--received I-171H
7-20-2007--mailed complete dossier to CHI
Not sure of dates for consulate and translation
10-19-2007--dossier registered at MOFA in Kazakhstan
11-18-2007--started my blog
11-30-2007--dossier registered at MOE
9-11-2008--received word that my dossier was returned from Kaz
9-22-2008--Started application process to new agency for Russia Program.
October 2008--attended required Preadoption classes
Dec. 29 2008--1st homestudy visit
Jan. 8 2009--2nd homestudy visit and approval granted
Jan. 28 2009--recieved region assignment and revised I-171H with country change to Russia
Feb. 6 2009--sent in dossier part 1 to agency
Feb. 10 2009--Dossier part 1 sent to Russia!
Oct. 6 2009--received THE CALL--I have been referred a daughter.
Oct. 8 2009--said yes to referral
Oct. 9 2009--received travel dates for Trip 1
Oct. 26, 2009--left for first trip to Krasnoyarsk
Oct. 28, 2009--Met my daughter for the first time!!
Oct. 31, 2009--signed petition to court to adopt my daughter.
Nov. 1, 2009--returned home from first trip
Dec. 29, 2009--Got the call that I had a court date
Jan. 13, 2010--Leave for 2nd trip
Jan. 15, 2010--8 MD medical exam in Moscow
Jan. 19, 2010--successful court--I AM A MOM!
Jan 30, 2010--Hannah came to be with me forever!
Feb. 6, 2010--We arrived HOME!!!!!!!!
Dec. 2006--Jan. 2007 researched agencies
2-1-2007--Applied to CHI's Kazakhstan program
2-13-2007--accepted into CHI Kazakhstan program
2-26-2007 to 5-1-2007 homestudy
5-28-2007--received I-171H
7-20-2007--mailed complete dossier to CHI
Not sure of dates for consulate and translation
10-19-2007--dossier registered at MOFA in Kazakhstan
11-18-2007--started my blog
11-30-2007--dossier registered at MOE
9-11-2008--received word that my dossier was returned from Kaz
9-22-2008--Started application process to new agency for Russia Program.
October 2008--attended required Preadoption classes
Dec. 29 2008--1st homestudy visit
Jan. 8 2009--2nd homestudy visit and approval granted
Jan. 28 2009--recieved region assignment and revised I-171H with country change to Russia
Feb. 6 2009--sent in dossier part 1 to agency
Feb. 10 2009--Dossier part 1 sent to Russia!
Oct. 6 2009--received THE CALL--I have been referred a daughter.
Oct. 8 2009--said yes to referral
Oct. 9 2009--received travel dates for Trip 1
Oct. 26, 2009--left for first trip to Krasnoyarsk
Oct. 28, 2009--Met my daughter for the first time!!
Oct. 31, 2009--signed petition to court to adopt my daughter.
Nov. 1, 2009--returned home from first trip
Dec. 29, 2009--Got the call that I had a court date
Jan. 13, 2010--Leave for 2nd trip
Jan. 15, 2010--8 MD medical exam in Moscow
Jan. 19, 2010--successful court--I AM A MOM!
Jan 30, 2010--Hannah came to be with me forever!
Feb. 6, 2010--We arrived HOME!!!!!!!!
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6 comments:
I understand wanting to keep your news to yourself for a while, but hopefully you will receive lots of encouragement (and no negativity!) from your coworkers.
We kept it from our co-workers (not our boss, obviously since they had to help with some of the employment paperworkd) until our dossier was in Kaz. We were asked more than anticipated if we had heard news and gently turned the conversation to more of baby preparation stuff - to keep our excitement up and recognize that they wanted to be excited for us and yet couldn't comprehend all of the unknowns.
I hope you find nothing but support and love from those you work with while they respect the process that you are going through :)
Thank you for your sweet comment! In this world of believers, we are all in the same family, near or far :)
You are such a sweet and giving person, I can't help but think everyone who knows you will be very happy for you! I will be first on that list of very happy for you!!
You handled the situation great. I told coworkers early on. Partly because of my excitment. I did however make our blog private for a little while, to many people were viewing it and with office politics - it made it a littel uncomfortable for a while. Things have settled and our blog is back in the public forum.
I was a little apprehensive at first too but then decided that it was a good opportunity to educate people on the ups and downs of international adoption (and hopefully gain more recognition and acceptance of it). Plus it was all I was thinking about too the closer it got so it was fun to talk about it. On the downside, yes, I got very sick of people asking me on a daily basis whether I had news. I finally told them that they would hear it first as I'd let out a big "rebel yell" once I got the call! And here I was out of town when we got the call so I missed my opportunity!
(From Mrs. LIAYF) - Found your blog at my friend's blog mamaandrea.blogspot.com (we are friends from middle school).
Your waiting game sounds similar to when my husband and I were TTC, and told everyone about it. We turned out to have infertility problems and got lots of "are you pregnant yet" questions for four years, until we had our son!
Waiting is so very hard. And, people who don't understand what you are going through can be insensitive. Hoping your colleagues at work are considerate and that you find some good support.
And, hoping you meet your daughter soon and bring her home!
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