This past weekend we had my parents 50th wedding anniversary party--August 23rd was their actual wedding date. It was a great day and they had a wonderful time--more about that on a later post--hopefully with pictures.
On the adoption front--I have so appreciated all the support from fellow bloggers--my family and friends are great and supportive but don't really understand all the stuff going on in IA--not that we really do either but at least you really understand how it affects me and your support has been tremendous.
In between party planning I have tried to research options--it is time to move on.
I still feel the sadness of losing out on Kazakhstan--I really thought my daughter was there and I grieve for the little girl I never met there. I truly hope that the changes they are making help all the orphans in Kaz find homes and I pray for them daily.
I don't feel like I can start over in Kazakhstan with all the uncertainty that looms for singles adopting there.
I looked for good programs that could likely accomplish an adoption for a single woman in one year or less which didn't leave a lot open.
I think I have narrowed it down to two options.
1. Krygyzstan--this program is very similar to Kaz except that they do referrals and give information about the child prior to travel. the country and children are similar to Kaz so it feels familiar to me and I like that. they do not allow gender selection (with most agencies) and I can go with that. The downside is that it is a very small country so there are fewer children and many more PAP's are looking at it since Kaz has gotten so much more difficult. I have joined a Krygyzstan chat group and just like the Kaz group, they are an amazing group and I have made friends already. that is the advantage of the smaller group--I already feel like I know some of them.
2. Russia--This is a very long established program that has been very stable in the past year. They do still allow single parents and gender selection. this is a much larger group of PAP's so it doesn't feel quite as personal but still a great bunch of people. The biggest advantage of this program is the proven stablity. While there are no guarantees in IA--this sounds about as close as you can get to one.
With each option I have a specific agency in mind. I don't want to name the agencies yet but I have had great conversations with both. I have been impressed with the people I have contacted and they both sound very promising. The Krygyzstan agency is smaller and so is the country--for some reason this appeals to me but I liked that about Kazakhstan when choosing that and it didn't turn out so well.
The agency with Russia is the largest one there and works with about 25 regions in Russia. They have been very stable which is very attractive to me at this point.
How do I decide what to do??? I need to pray and think and then just dive in.
Any comments, suggestions, prayers or well wishes you could send my way would be greatly appreciated. I definitely want to stay connected with all the Kaz families I have come to know through this process--I love reading about your families and adoption journeys and you have been my support for the last 18 months so I don't want to lose that.
Monday, August 25, 2008
Friday, August 15, 2008
It's been a bad day
Yesterday we got bad news about the Kazakhstan program.
The Committee of Child's Rights Protection, in Astana, has informed all agency representatives of a new policy change regarding gender request. Effective immediately, any dossiers that have requested a specific gender, and have not yet been assigned to a region, will be returned with no exceptions. In their own words, "All children are equal and have equal rights for family and happiness!"
Unfortunately, this will mean that dossiers that are resubmitted will have to go through the Kazakhstan Embassy in Washington D.C.
I was totally crushed. My dossier has been in Kazakhstan since Sept. but no region assignment yet so this was the news I had been dreading--that some change would come along and kick me out of the program. I totally agree that all children are created equal and deserve loving homes and I would gladly take any child however 18 months ago I was told to request exactly what I preferred--I have done everything that has been asked along this journey and now I feel as if I am being punished for doing something that I didn't even know was wrong. If only we could change our dossiers and stay in place at the MOE--why do we have to start over????? I don't know what to think anymore--I am just very sad.
The Committee of Child's Rights Protection, in Astana, has informed all agency representatives of a new policy change regarding gender request. Effective immediately, any dossiers that have requested a specific gender, and have not yet been assigned to a region, will be returned with no exceptions. In their own words, "All children are equal and have equal rights for family and happiness!"
Unfortunately, this will mean that dossiers that are resubmitted will have to go through the Kazakhstan Embassy in Washington D.C.
I was totally crushed. My dossier has been in Kazakhstan since Sept. but no region assignment yet so this was the news I had been dreading--that some change would come along and kick me out of the program. I totally agree that all children are created equal and deserve loving homes and I would gladly take any child however 18 months ago I was told to request exactly what I preferred--I have done everything that has been asked along this journey and now I feel as if I am being punished for doing something that I didn't even know was wrong. If only we could change our dossiers and stay in place at the MOE--why do we have to start over????? I don't know what to think anymore--I am just very sad.
Wednesday, August 6, 2008
Thanks Rose
I have to say Thanks to Rose--I got this song off her blog but I really liked it and it so pertains to this adoption waiting period:
One Step at a Time"
Jordin Sparks
Hurry up and wait
So close, but so far away
Everything that you've always dreamed of
Close enough for you to taste, but you just can't touch
You wanna show the world
But no one knows your name yet
Who and when and where and how you're gonna make it
You know you can, if you get the chance
In your face, the door keeps slammin
Now you're feeling more and more frustrated
And you're getting all kinds of impatient
Waiting
(Chorus)
We live and we learn
To take one step at a time
There's no need to rush
It's like learning to fly, or falling in love
It's gonna happen, when it's supposed to happen
And we find the reasons why
One step at a time
You believe, and you doubt
You're confused, you've got it all figured out
Everything that you've always wished for
Could be yours, should be yours, or would be yours
If they only knew
You wanna show the world
But no one knows your name yet
Who and when and where and how you're gonna make it
You know you can, if you get the chance
In your face, the door keeps slammin
Now you're feeling more and more frustrated
And you're gettin all kinds of impatient
Waiting
We live and we learn
To take one step at a time
There's no need to rush
It's like learning to fly, or falling in love
It's gonna happen, when it's supposed to happen
And we find the reasons why
One step at a time
When you can't wait any longer
But there's no end in sight
It's your faith that makes you strong
Only way we get there
Is one step at a time
One Step at a Time"
Jordin Sparks
Hurry up and wait
So close, but so far away
Everything that you've always dreamed of
Close enough for you to taste, but you just can't touch
You wanna show the world
But no one knows your name yet
Who and when and where and how you're gonna make it
You know you can, if you get the chance
In your face, the door keeps slammin
Now you're feeling more and more frustrated
And you're getting all kinds of impatient
Waiting
(Chorus)
We live and we learn
To take one step at a time
There's no need to rush
It's like learning to fly, or falling in love
It's gonna happen, when it's supposed to happen
And we find the reasons why
One step at a time
You believe, and you doubt
You're confused, you've got it all figured out
Everything that you've always wished for
Could be yours, should be yours, or would be yours
If they only knew
You wanna show the world
But no one knows your name yet
Who and when and where and how you're gonna make it
You know you can, if you get the chance
In your face, the door keeps slammin
Now you're feeling more and more frustrated
And you're gettin all kinds of impatient
Waiting
We live and we learn
To take one step at a time
There's no need to rush
It's like learning to fly, or falling in love
It's gonna happen, when it's supposed to happen
And we find the reasons why
One step at a time
When you can't wait any longer
But there's no end in sight
It's your faith that makes you strong
Only way we get there
Is one step at a time
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