Monday, May 4, 2009

Updates but really no new news

My agency had a conference call with Russian families today to give us updates on the situation of adoption in Russia as they know it.
It was great to have that contact with the agency and to know they are keeping us all informed. I have been hearing most of what they said already so there were no big surprises.
The two main things they talked about are the increase of domestic adoption in Russia and the emergence of a foster care system in Russia.
Both of these trends are very good things for the country of Russia and for the children of Russia so I am happy about that. However they both have consequences for International Adoption that are difficult as a waiting parent.
Russian families that are adopting or fostering a child have the same wants as American families--most want young healthy girls which is true of American families. This causes fewer children (especially girls) to be available for International Adoption, causing longer waits, and more health risks in the children that are still available for International Adoption. Using a couple IA Doctors in your process is something they strongly recommend. They also recommend educating yourself on the possible medical issues because families that are prepared can usually handle them all successfully.
This may make things sound bleak but they truly were not trying to scare us. They still feel that the Russian program is a very good option for building a family through adoption--they just want us all to be realistic.
So what does this mean to me??
Basically it means that I wait---and wait--and maybe wait some more. What else is new--This whole process has increased in waiting every time I turn around. My patience is surely being tested and I am not always passing. One thing I have decided though is that I am not ready to give up so onward I go with more waiting.

The issue of why adoptive parents don't want boys as much is something I haven't figured out and is a whole nother topic. Maybe it is something I should seriously think about.

7 comments:

Jeff Morris said...

It's good to hear that your agency is telling the realities of Russian adoptions. It's my hope and prayer that all agencies do this. Sadly, that's not the case.

Hang in there with the wait. It'll happen before you know it.

John & Jenny Morgan said...

I hate that your wait time will increase, but I am glad that you are informed. Knowing what's going on is better than not, that's for sure. I hope you are pleasantly surprised by a quicker-than-expected referral!

qmiller said...

Mary: Glad to hear that you're staying the course! Hang in there, enjoy the arrival of spring, and keep the faith!
Quaintance

Misty Clark said...

You have a great attitude and the wait will definitely be worth it! Hang in there.

Aaron and Julie said...

I'm sorry to hear the wait time has seemingly increased - you have the patience of Job right now & are amazing!! Hang in there Mary, I'm glad you have a good agency to help you through the wait & keep you informed along the way.

Gender: As with everything, you have to follow your heart on this. I'm not sure if this was on our blog, but we initially wanted to adopt a girl as well. We thought we would adopt from China, but applied to Kaz before we could apply for China (age restrictions)& left the gender open for God to decide. I had no idea two boys were in my future - and now wouldn't have it any other way. I thought I would still ache for a girl, but am at peace with it.

Kim said...

Praying for you always!

qmiller said...

Mary: Keep on checking for any news...I've got my finger crossed and prayers ongoing that you'll hear something soon! Thanks for the kind words on my blogs...things are going so much better!
Quaintance