Tuesday, January 8, 2008

What a way to start the New Year

Happy New Year--a little late.
I had a terrible cold turned into sinus infection over the New Year so didn't feel like posting then. I worked as much as I could to save my time off for the adoption but finally had to cave in and take a couple days off work.
The same day that I decided I couldn't get up for work, I got a call that my Dad was coming by ambulance to the hospital. He was having difficulty breathing and his oxygen was very low. X-rays showed fluid on his lungs so the initial thought was that his heart wasn't working well and he had congestive heart failure. Afte several tests, we discovered that wasn't the case and he had a terrible case of pneumonia. They used a needle and aspirated a liter of fluid off one lung! Needless to say, he could breathe much better after that. We are thankful that tests show his heart is working well and his recent surgery was successfull but given the fact he has chronic luekemia, the pneumonia is quite serious also. He spent 6 six days in the hospital and was just released today but will continue with IV antibiotics every day. Unfortunately, he isn't out of the woods yet. While he was in the hospital, my mom stayed with me. I am just glad that I can offer them a place to stay and some support when they have medical problems.
I have had many thoughts on being a "sandwich generation"--that is what my mom says and she means that I have to take care of my parents and my child, which may be true at times. I also had thoughts about it when I got a flyer for preparing for my retirement and realized that I am trying to balance saving for retirement and for bringing home a new baby--no small feat to come up with funds for both. I feel like I am not quite doing enough for either right now. Sometimes it worries me to think along those lines and at other times I just know that everything will work out okay when I have my daughter because it is just what I am meant to do. My whole life I've known I should be a mother and that I would be a great one so now it's time. All the rest will follow.
Maybe it's affecting me more today because tomorrow is my birthday and I turn 47 (yikes).
Here's hoping I will be home with my daughter before I'm 48.

7 comments:

Matthew Ruley said...

Caring for parents is hard. (I cared for my aunt (never married, no kids), my mom and dad), so I kind of understand.

Its very hard to see parents in a different light. When that happens, roles are reversed. You become it comforter, the caretaker, the strong one, the one with all the answers.

I obvioulsy don't know what you are going through as only you can see your perspective, but and I empathize. If you need a listening, sympathetic ear, just call or email. I'll be praying for you and your dad and also for your mom.

Unknown said...

Hope your father gets better real soon.

Have a good birthday, your last without a child.

Anonymous said...

Mary,
I'm so sorry to hear about your dad. Praying he gets better quickly. Also, praying that your sinus infection will heal soon. I wish you a very Happy Birthday! I hope the best for you! Keep in touch~

Miss you,

Ali Heglund

Aaron and Julie said...

I am praying for your dad & mom and for you as you navigate so many things at once. You will be a great mom - I am so glad that I can follow your journey in this New Year!

Karen said...

Hi Mary:

I'm also a PAP and live in the Twin Cities, so we're neighbors of sorts. :-)

Sorry to hear about your father—I pray he's feeling better now. Also Happy Birthday. You've got a lot to think about right now, but just trust your gut: everything will work out. You'll be a great mother.

Karen

Karen said...

Hi Mary—

You have just been tagged (see my blog).

Karen :-)

Matthew Ruley said...

You're tagged! Visit my blog to see what it means (read Sunday's post).

How's your dad doing? Any adoption news?